Oracle Online

It’s an unfortunate social convention common to many cultures. Looking directly into another’s eyes can be seen as being too serious or intense, and causes a certain degree of social discomfort.

Pay attention to where you look the next time you are in a conversation, even with a close friend. Often you may notice that you may look at their face or hands, but almost never directly into their eyes for longer than a second or two.

In fact, if you force yourself to look into your friend’s eyes, you may feel the need to look away for a few seconds. Do you need to give your friend time to “recover” from a direct gaze? How did this happen to us as a community? Are we willing to talk to one another’s shoulders and not eyes?

I feel that making direct eye contact shouldn’t be reserved just for lovers and promise-makers. There’s nothing to be afraid of. You can look at a stranger without staring awkwardly as you pass him or her by.

I feel that avoiding looking at others on a regular basis can, in fact, damage your perceptions and change the way you can comfortably relate to people. I feel this from experience: there have been times when I have done everything to look at trees, the cement of the sidewalk, or the squirrels growing fat on nuts rather than looking at the person I am walking and talking with. It creates a feeling that we are separated from those around us --that we are lonely individuals just trying to make it to class so we can do well in school.

College is about more than grades. We are not alone in the world. Next time you walk past someone on the way to class, look up. Notice something about them. Smile at them. You may be surprised at how much better it can make you feel.