Oracle Online

As we rapidly approach another election, events have already taken a turn for the weird. First on the radar, of course, is the scandal surrounding disgraced Republican Congressman Mark Foley of Florida. Foley has been sending some rather explicit e-mails and even more explicit instant messages to teenage congressional pages over the last few years. Foley’s top aide, Kirk Fordham, recently made a statement claiming that House Speaker Dennis Hastert was notified of concerns about Foley’s conduct with pages before 2005.

ABC News is reporting that three more congressional pages have accused Foley of online sexual advances. These pages served in 1998, 2000 and 2002. This is not looking good. And House Speaker Hastert is refusing to step down from his post. With election prospects looking grave for Republicans in the House and Senate, the wise political move would be to kindly ask Hastert to resign as soon as possible. The unwise move would be to blame Democrats and the liberal media.

Prediction: House Speaker Dennis Hastert is eventually talked into resigning. Or Republicans lose even bigger.

Veteran Capitol Hill reporter Bob Woodward (of Watergate fame) recently published his book on the Bush administration’s war in Iraq, titled State of Denial: Bush at War. For a conservative-leaning journalist, this type of assessment bodes poorly for neo-conservatives everywhere. Here are some highlights: although members of the Bush administration stated continuously that the situation in Iraq was looking better all the time, intelligence distributed between different agencies and the White House understood that the conflict was worsening. This seems to be corroborated by a recent Pentagon report concluding that sectarian violence has reached new levels. Allegedly, a few weeks after Condoleeza Rice was named Secretary of State, she hired an old friend, Philip Zelikow, to go to Iraq and submit a report on the state of the war. His words in 2005, according to Woodward: “At this point Iraq remains a failed state shadowed by constant violence and undergoing revolutionary political change.” Well, I could have told you that. Where’s my book deal?

Although I’m loath to trust Bob Woodward on anything, I have to take this last point seriously, seeing as Bush has given no statement to make me believe otherwise: Bush plans on continuing the war no matter how few people in the White House, Congress or the country support him. (The latest CNN poll shows that 32% of the country “approves” of Bush’s handling of Iraq. Where are these people?) What scares the hell out of me is that we’re not talking about “winning” or “losing” the war anymore. Bush will “stay the course,” no matter what the damage to Iraq or the United States. And in 2008, our new President will inherit an absolute mess.

Prediction: No chance of pull-out in the next two years, no matter how terrible things look. Now that’s patriotism, ladies and gentleman.

Finally, a delightful mingling of a few of my favorite things: sports and politics. Greg Anderson, longtime friend and alleged supplier of steroids to Barry Bonds, was recently released from prison. Anderson’s refusal to testify in front of a grand jury earned him time in jail for contempt, but gained Bonds even more. Everybody knows Barry is guilty. A 2003 taperecording features Anderson discussing how he supplied the least popular man in sports with undetectable performance enhancers. The taperecording is held in scrutiny because Anderson’s lawyer is arguing that it was obtained illegally. Drat.

Prediction: Bonds may break Hank Aaron’s home run record, but after more investigation, Selig or the next commissioner will be justified in erasing it from the books. The guy is that guilty. Then again, so is Hastert.