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“The biology department has been lacking resources ever since the chemistry department was established and pilfered all our stuff. These little whipper-snappers are just what we need, in addition to many other things,” said Professor Ian Keller, long time head of the biology department.

Keller isn’t the only one looking forward to working with the new specimens. Countless biology students are also very excited. First-year prospective biology major Tabitha Zen said, “I’ve always loved working with little kids, just like I’ve always loved doing experiments. This is going to be awesome!”

Students in kindergarten through fourth grade will participate in the program. Older children will not take part, as it is feared they may resist certain tasks, or exhibit early signs of the infamous middle school attitude, which no one wants to deal with.

Hancock student involvement is completely involuntary. The five lowest performing students’ names in each class will be submitted to the biology department, and Hamline students will then have the opportunity to interview the children and decide which one they would like to work with. Still, a waiver form will need to be signed by the child’s parent or guardian. If the child becomes physically or emotionally harmed, no Hamline student or faculty member can be held responsible.

Resistance to this addition to the Hand-in-Hand program has already begun to surface. Student organizations such as MPIRG and Students For a Free Tibet have been spotted protesting outside of Robbins Science.

There are a handful of faculty members in opposition as well. “My kids never had an opportunity like this. It’s just not fair,” said Professor of Progressive Affairs Tanya Rice.