Oracle Online

O: Don’t you need to go to graduate school to earn a that?

DC: I don’t think so. I’ve been in college eight years, that ought to be enough.

O: OK. What do you want to do after you graduate?

DC: I’m going to be a doctor.

O: A doctor with an environmental studies education? Can you do that?

DC: What your major is isn’t important. All they care about it that you’ve gone to college and are educated.

O: What classes do have left to take for next year?

DC: I haven’t done my natural science courses, and Hamline won’t let me graduate without completing a FYSEM.

O: You haven’t taken a FYSEM?

DC: [Laughs] No, not yet. I start one every year, but I always end up losing interest and dropping it. I usually transfer to a music class instead. I play the didjeridu quite well.

O: What FYSEMs have you been in?

DC: Well, my very first year here I was in one called What it Means to be Human. I realized it didn’t really apply to me, so I dropped it. This year I was temporarily enrolled in the FYSEM that went to Trinidad, but when I realized that I had to spend January in the Caribbean I was like, “I think not.”

O: That’s awesome that you play the didjeridu. Are you in a band or anything?

DC: Obviously I’m in a band. Can’t you tell by my rhinestone belt and glasses?

O: Sorry, my error. What is your band’s name?

DC: Dejection Unlimited.

O: Who are your musical influences?

DC: David Bowie, Rammstein, Enya, ABBA, Coldplay, and of course, myself.

O: What does your band sing about?

DC: It doesn’t sing.

O: What other instruments are in Dejection Unlimited?

DC: None more, just me and my didjeridu. But don’t let that fool you into thinking that my band doesn’t have skills and themes.

O: What are the themes do you express?

DC: Oh, everything. I consider theme to be a vital element in any song, and any work of art for that matter. Everything needs to be about something. Some of my songs are about love, some are about agony, some are about lip gloss in my cat’s ears.

O: That was kind of random.

DC: Yeah, randomness is pretty much my secret talent. I love being random. Being random provides a great way to release built up identity laced with emotion and show the world just how special you really are. A completely random comment never fails to be super-funny.

O: What other sorts of activities are you involved with?

DC: I’m an active member of PETA, HUGS and the Food Service Committee.

O: Do you consider being in activities to be pretty important?

DC: Absolutely! If I wasn’t involved like I am, I would probably be doing something ridiculous, like sports.

O: Have you ever participated in any sports?

DC: Purple rain flowers fell down and smashed my doll on the roof with their chunky tears!

O: What does that mean?

DC: You’re not getting it. That was my super random comment. It was funny.

O: Oh. What other stuff do you like?

DC: I like animals.

O: Do you have any pets?

DC: Indeed. I have a hairless cat, her name is Hairless Agnes. She has a tattoo and everything. It is amazing.

O: Your cat has a tattoo?

DC: Yup. She’s got a dolphin on her hip. It’s in color, you should do a story on it. She doesn’t do interviews though.

O: How did your cat manage to get a tattoo?

DC: To be perfectly honest, I’m not entirely sure. One night my roommate set Hairless Agnes on the lawn, and she disappeared for a few days. She turned up on my steps in a wicker basket a few weeks later with a tattoo. I imagine tranquilizers were involved.

O: Were you mad?

DC: Initially, I was slightly bothered. But within a few hours I remembered that I’m an advocate of flair. I’m cool like that.