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While on campus, however, many do feel accepted. While some students are surprised to find out that a peer is also mother or father, many student parents don’t feel like they are treated very differently.

They also agree that managing the needs of a child with the needs of professors and other academic responsibilities is a tiring process.

A delicate balancing act

The most difficult thing about being a student parent is time management, said Sara Barnes, a first-year student and single mother of two-and-a-half year old Jason. She said she tries to be organized and efficient because she knows her work equates directly to her success. With working about 20 hours a week, taking 16 credits, participating in organizations on campus, and raising a son, most would probably wonder how she does it.

“It seems pretty obvious to me,” Barnes said. “I just don’t have as much time for my friends, for myself, for sleep.”

Junior Terese Garcia has her hands full with three young children č Danielle, 7, Gabrielle, 10, and
Dominique, 11. She agrees with Barnes that trying to juggle time spent with her children between making it to classes is difficult.

“The most difficult thing is having to spend a lot of time away from them to get studying done,” she said.

She needs quiet time to keep up the quality of her work, and that is hard to find in a house with three kids.
She often has to study outside of her home.

Barnes said it is important to her to spend time with her son, so she waits until she puts him to bed, usually between 8 and 9, to start on her studies.

Christina Romo, a senior with a 23-month-old son, A.J., struggles as well.

“You lose a lot of sleep,” she said. “Last night I was up doing a paper until 1:30 a.m. and he woke up right when I was about to go to bed.”
Considering childcare

“One thing that is very important when you’re a parent is having a strong support system,” Garcia said. Her children are in school during the day, and when she has night classes, her husband of 15 years takes care of their three children. He travels a lot, though, so her mother watches them when he is out of town.

“Sometimes,” she said, “they have to take care of themselves.”

Barnes said her son goes to a good daycare, but it isn’t close to home or school. Her family helps out on the days she can’t pick Jason up before the daycare closes. She planned on moving Jason to the
Hamline daycare when he turned three, the age children had to be to enroll in the daycare, but it closed and the building was torn down before she had the chance.

Romo also said she wanted to use Hamline’s daycare last year, but they didn’t take infants. She and her husband of more than two years alternate their schedules, so one of them can be home with A.J. all of the time. Her parents help out by watching him once in a while.

When she isn’t able to find somebody to watch him, she brings him to work or class.

“The people in admissions think he is the admissions baby,” she said with a smile. “I worked there when I was pregnant and I bring him in now, so they’ve seen him grow up.”

Romo once had to bring A.J. to history professor Nurith Zmora’s class. Romo said she asked Zmora about it before she brought him, and Zmora said she would rather her bring A.J. and come to class than miss it.

“Everybody loved having him in class,” Romo said.

Barnes said she was disappointed that there was no on-campus housing for students with children. She had considered living in the Hamline apartments, but was told they weren’t a good fit for her by Residential Life.

Res Life director Patti Klein said the apartments weren’t constructed to be family-friendly.

She said her office is not opposed to having families in the apartments, but most people choose not to live there because they are simply not cost effective. They expect two students to live in a two-bedroom apartment, and this year, they charge $631 per student.

Klein added that the apartments, which are intended for law and graduate students, were not intended to be a type of environment conducive to families.

Another hurdle for student parents to go to school are attendance policies.

“I’m lucky because most of my professors are pretty understanding about missing classes because they’re sick,” Garcia said.

In her art history class, though, her grade drops if she misses more than three classes.

“Classes should be more flexible for older students with kids. If you’re keeping up with classes, I don’t think attendance should affect your grade,” she said.

Barnes said attendance policies are a more common problem for students with kids, but not a bigger problem than with regular students.

“Professors have been amazing,” Romo said, “They let me miss class if [A.J. is] sick or if he needs to go to an appointment.”

The future is the bottom line

Romo said of her experience as a student and parent: “It may be difficult, but it’s definitely worth it. It’s been a really positive experience.”

Barnes agrees that the struggles are worth it.

“It’s about making a future for you and your child,” she said.