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In both sexes, this spread of skin is packed with an extraordinary amount of nerve endings, which often causes extreme sensations when stimulated. It derives its nickname from the phrase “Well, it ain’t the penis/vagina and ’t ain’t the ass, either.”

And let me tell you, TD, ’t ain’t odd to love a little strokin’ in the taint region, whether you are a guy or a gal. And just so you know, ’t ain’t a comment on your sexuality if you like a little touching down there.

Our society often stigmatizes anal sex as an illicit, dirty act only suitable for homosexuals and the sexually promiscuous. In truth, any sort of anal penetration or touching, like vaginal penetration and touching, is practiced by many peoplečstraight or otherwisečbecause it can feel extremely pleasurable.

And if it feels good and you’re being completely safe about it, why be so afraid of it? Try it!

If your girlfriend thinks you are gay simply because you request that she touch you in the vicinity of the anus, then she may have some issues that she needs to consider regarding sex and the way she views sexuality.

I would broach the subject by telling her what you told me, which is that you heard something about this really sensitive spot and that you would like it if she played around with it while you two are messing around sometime. And then I would also inform her that you did a little research on the topic and found out that this uber-sensitive point exists in women as well and that you would be more than willing to try touching and stroking her there because new sensations are always exciting.

When it comes to actually stimulating the perineum, I have a little more advice for you, TD. When first starting out, whether it is on you or your girlfriend, go slow and focus on what feels the best. Try petting, rubbing, or even blowing air on this special region. If this seems to feel good, then you might want to try stimulating this area from inside as well.

On women, this can be accomplished by inserting a finger into the vagina and pressing or gently stroking the lower, rear vaginal wall. You can also try this on the inner rectal wall in both men and women. And yes, that would mean sticking a finger (a lubed digit would work best) into the anus.

And no, that still wouldn’t make you gay if you participated in or enjoyed this activity. It would make you normal human being, like everyone else who enjoys sexual stimulation on a basic level, because it simply makes your body feel nice.

Disclaimer: Molly Kirwan has aspirations of being a sexpert but no professional training. To submit a comment or question, e-mail it to mkirwan01@gw.hamline.edu or drop it off at the Oracle office (DS106).